Vacancy

Music for empty rooms, spooling loops, and palindromes that don't quite work.

Vacancy  (00:39)

Black Hattery

While going through my server logs a week back, I noticed some odd traffic. The site was getting hits from keywords like "Viagra" and "Cialis." This is strange, considering that I've never really had much interest in, ahem, male enhancement products. When I checked my site in Google, I found this bit of oddness:



I did some research, and the diagnosis seemed to be that the site had been hacked.

Except it hadn't. I went through and checked for all of the usual symptoms, but found none. File permissions and timestamps were unchanged. There was no unusual FTP traffic. My database was clean. I followed Chris Pearson's advice and checked for rogue files. There were none. I ran Cotton Rohrscheib's scripts against everything, but I found no base64_decode functions other than where they should be. My theme files are hand-coded, so it was a trivial matter to rule out tampering.

Wordpress wasn't the problem. My server wasn't the problem. Foreigners and hippies weren't the problem.

That leaves Google.

Sooner or Later

We know now that the ATF sat by and let straw purchases of weapons happen in Phoenix.  We know they reassured dealers that the weapons would be tracked.  We know that didn't happen, and that those weapons have been used in dozens of homicides.

As of today, we also know that the ATF themselves purchased weapons and sold them to criminals.  Apparently, John Dodson was given authorization and ordered by Supervisor Voth to pick up a few Draco pistols and deliver them to suspects.

I'm not sure why Dodson didn't bring this up during his testimony to Congress back in June.  Any risk of self-incrimination can easily be countered by the Nuremberg Defense, especially considering that his vehement resistance to the idea is well documented.

This whole thing is far worse than Watergate, and yet only two mainstream news organizations are actively following it.  I don't know what it's going to take to bring this to the front page, but Congressional hearings are largely toothless when the department charged with prosecuting the issue is complicit in the problem at hand.

A Lubricious Incline

News comes that politicians in Boston are looking to curb violent crime by restricting the sale of knives.

There's some precedent for this across the Atlantic. In the United Kingdom, they responded to a high homicide rate by banning guns. Something had to be done.

Then they saw an epidemic of knife crime, so they banned many types of knives. Something had to be done.

Then folks started assaulting each other with pint beer glasses, and something had to be done. They considered mandating plastic glasses.  I am not kidding.

When folks start beating each other with tire irons, rolling pins, and lawn gnomes, something will have to be done.

If Dihydrogen Monoxide continues to claim as many lives as it currently does, something will have to be done.

Of course, they could try looking at the root causes of violence, such as unemployment and alcoholism, and...oh, who am I kidding?  It's easier to just ban stuff.

For the wee drunken children and all.

On Desperation

By now, you've likely heard of Attack Watch, a site on which loyal citizens can report their friends, neighbors, politicians, boss, or gardener for spreading "misinformation" about the President and his agenda.  The site is registered to Obama for America, an underdog organization with only about $140,629,243 in capital.  It's not quite the Ministry of Love, but it'll have to do.

I got to thinking, and I've been pretty hard on the guy myself.  In fact, I'm positively wracked with guilt.  As such, I've turned myself in to the site.  I advise anyone else who's disagreed with the administration to do so as well.  Consider it a gesture of purgation and reconciliation.  Really, isn't it time we started healing as a country?

I've also taken the proactive step of reporting anyone I suspect of not having the moral character to do so themselves.  A short list follows.

On Hypocrisy

John Crewdson has an article on Bloomberg in which he laments the progress of H.R. 822.  One implication of the bill is that a New York resident could bypass his own state's requirements by simply getting a non-resident concealed weapon license from Florida, which New York would have to honor.

Apparently, this represents such an existential crisis for Mr. Crewdson that he applied for a Florida license. He details the process in the article, along with the fact that he lied on the application:

I’ve never touched a handgun and I haven’t been to Florida in decades, yet this month Florida officials mailed me a permit to carry a concealed gun.  (...)  Florida, which granted my permit after I viewed a half- hour, online safety video, now says it made a mistake.

Florida Statute 790.06 clearly stipulates that the applicant must have taken one of the training courses listed within, but Mr. Crewdson did not complete any of them.  False statements on the application constitute a second-degree misdemeanor under Section 837.06.  Oops.

Will he be prosecuted?  Unlikely.  Still, there's a certain bit of schadenfreude in the fact that a Pulitzer Prize winner would have to sink this low to make a point.  It makes me question the validity of the Pulitzer when they'll give one to this shill, but not to Duke Ellington.

(Thanks to Rob Allen for the heads-up.)

On Civility

Oh, this is just lovely. A company called StarvingEyes Advergaming is hosting a Flash game called Tea Party Zombies Must Die. It's a first-person shooter that allows the player to kill zombiefied versions of Sarah Palin, Newt Gingrich, and other Tea Party celebrities.

What's that again about conservatives being hate mongers?

Felix Gilman: The Half-Made World

This is one of the most unique works of fiction I've read in awhile.  A summary doesn't do it justice, but I'd recommend it to anyone with even a passing interest in science fiction or fantasy.

Spoilers ahead.  If you don't want the good bits given away, go read the book, then come back.

On second thought, that would make reading this article pointless.  Oh well.   Do what you want.  Free country and all.

1937 All Over Again

For someone claiming unalloyed fealty to the Constitution, Rick Perry sure does want to tinker with it. He's called for repeal of the 16th and 17th Amendments, and he wants new ones to outlaw abortion and gay marriage.

This guy wants to take our founding document and tailor it to fit his personal whims. That should scare the living daylights out of any American.

Equally strange are his plans for the Supreme Court. He wants rolling term limits for Justices, and he wants to give Congress the power to overrule verdicts by a 2/3 vote. Both ideas are wretched, and both have been tried before.

Lando Calrissian: A Man for Our Time

We were pretty slow at work this weekend. Apparently, Atlanta is not only hosting a football game, but Dragon*Con and Black Gay Pride as well. It's hard to compete with a lineup that covers that many bases.

Given this unprecedented confluence of diversity, one must inevitably wonder: is Lando Calrissian getting the respect he deserves? He could be a major influence for cultural integration and acceptance.

Seriously, look at the guy. He's all kinds of fabulous.



Now, I'm not implying anything here.  Lando does seem to prefer the company of women, but then there's this:



Of course, that doesn't prove much, either. I'm not gay, but I'd let Harrison Ford hug me. I might draw the line at second base, but I could definitely find it in my heart to forgive him for that awful film he made with Ellen Degeneres' ex-wife.

In any case, I'd like to declare September 4th National Lando Calrissian Appreciation Day.  The man has the potential to bring us all closer together.  I mean, what else is there to commemorate?  Anton Bruckner's birthday?  The deposition of Romulus Augustulus?  The founding of the Third Republic?  Bah, says I.  Lando's the man, and he deserves this day.